"You can only start from where you are and you can only begin in the present."
~ Patrick McBride (Thanks to Mary Morrissey)
I was upset and disappointed when I went outside to dig up dirt to prepare for a garden at my new place. I had just read, "Congratulations! We would like to offer you the position of: "... the lowest level job we have. How dare they! That level is usually reserved for college age kids with little experience. I have experience and credentials! But as I was digging, my frustration and outrage lessened. I let go of my emotional attachment to what it was I thought I wanted and let the process of creating a new foundation calm me. How very zen, how very like my God, to keep me humble and remember what is really important.
I started thinking of how similar preparing to go back to a regular job after laying fallow was to starting a garden in a differently used piece of land. Both the roots of unwanted plants and undeserved pride needed to be turned over. Digging deep, I realized there is no need for me to jump into a position with a lot of responsibility. I have been through so many changes recently that starting at the bottom will be good for me. I will be like a new sprout ready to take root and grow. All of the reasons that I applied for the job in the first place were still there: it starts late in the morning and ends after traditional desk jobs are over so that I miss the heavy freeway traffic; because of the later start time I can continue my morning workouts; and, it doesn't end so late that I cannot tutor in the evenings.
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| Salsa Garden plot |
Working the soil is very satisfying. Working with students is satisfying. My garden-to-be doesn't look like much now but it has great potential. And starting as community services assistant I doesn't sound impressive, but there is potential for growth.
